July 9, 2016

Disappointed Nigel Fromage supporters have found something to hope for again in the atrociousness of Andrea Leadsom.

Appalling people across the country were at risk of becoming politically disenfranchised following the UKIP leader’s resignation, but now feel very much involved again at the discovery of someone else terrible enough to affirm their dreadfulness.

Awful person Ray Doyle, from the neo-fascist town of Lancing, West Sussex, said: “I thought perhaps someone might be as bigoted and divisive as Nigel, or as deluded, or lacking in judgement – but all three?

“Then I read about Andrea Leadsom making up her CV and opposing gay marriage and promising to bring back a cruel sport and prioritise closing borders over the economy, and being a ‘proud Christian’.

“I mean she’s really awful.

“I was worried she might have judgement but then saw that she was really angry with a newspaper for telling people what she said – so that’s the stupid box ticked, too.

“It means awful people of poor judgement themselves can feel engaged with politics again – and we don’t even have to be on the political fringes anymore.

“I feel as though any minute she might take off a mask and be Nigel underneath and say: ‘I’m unresigning as Prime Minister.’

“That’s how good this is.”