July 26, 2016

Sir Philip Green is suing former BHS staff for any savings they may have squirrelled away before he plundered their futures to fund sitting on his arse on a yacht.

The multi-billionaire believes some may “still be holding out” on him, “perhaps with some Christmas savings in a jar, for example,” and intends to have “every last penny”.

A letter from Sir Philip’s lawyer to former BHS employees says: ‘My client’s voracious greed needs to be fed again.

‘He believes you may possibly have something put away somewhere for a rainy day, or perhaps a modest possession which could be exchanged for cash to give him.

‘He has instructed me to inform you that it’s raining, my friend, and Christmas is cancelled. Further, in the event that his appetite is not sated, it will henceforth pour like a motherfucker.’

Sir Philip, who isn’t actually green but orange, said: “People think I don’t have to worry about money running out but I do. I worry constantly about people running out of money to give me.”