December 16, 2016

An attempt by Vladimir Putin to hack Barack Obama’s phone ended in awkwardness when he accidentally found himself speaking to the US president.

The Russian president had phoned his US counterpart 58 times, on each occasion reaching voicemail and entering a new PIN in a bid to access messages, when on the 59th call Obama himself answered.

A transcript of the call obtained by Swan Bake reads as follows.

Obama: “Hello.”

Putin: [silence]

Obama: “Hello.”

Putin: “Um, I think I have the wrong number.”

Obama: “Is that you, Vladimir?”

Putin: “Yes, er, I mean. Hello Barack.”

Obama: “Hello.”

Putin: [long pause] “How are you?”

Obama: “What can I do for you, Vladimir?”

Putin: “I just called because, erm. It’s bitterly cold for the time year, isn’t it? Brrr.”

Obama: “No.”

Putin: “So what can I do you for?”

Obama: “You called me, Vladimir.”

Putin: “I called you Vladimir? Oh, I’m sorry. Awkwaard!”

Obama: “No, you phoned me. Vladimir. Fifty-eight times. Have you been trying to listen to my messages again?”

Putin: “Whaaat? Really? Of course not.”

Obama: “So why do I have 58 missed calls from your number?”

Putin: [pause] “Wow! Look. What’s that?”

Obama: “What?”

Putin: “Over there. In the corner.”

Obama: “I’m not in the same room as you, Vladimir.”

Putin: “Oh yeah. Bye.” [call ends]

A spokesperson for Mr Putin denied the call took place, insisting: “This is actually laughable nonsense. Hahahahaha. Aha. Ha.”