Theresa May left a library empty-handed after repeatedly insisting she could borrow a book despite cancelling her membership and refusing to pay fines.

The Prime Minister was attempting to borrow a book supporting her claim that both Britain and the EU need a free trade deal after Brexit despite indications it’s not a priority for the EU, when the librarian asked: “Do you have a library card?”
Mrs May replied: “We have a different relationship now but I think I can still have the same benefit in terms of free access to books.”
“Are you a member?” said the librarian.
“No but what we’re both still looking for is that free borrowing agreement that gives that ability for me to borrow freely and for you to lend freely,” said Mrs May.
“I’m not,” said the librarian. “Are you Theresa May? It says here you owe £20 in fines.”
“Negotiations over settlement of debts should be conducted at the same time as negotiations over access to free books,” said Mrs May.
“Er, no. Pay the fine and then we’ll talk about what you need to do to borrow a book,” said the librarian.
“In security terms a failure to reach an agreement would mean my cooperation in your fight against crime and terrorism would be weakened,” said Mrs May.
“Jill, call the police,” said the librarian.
“I have left library membership but I am not leaving the library,” said Mrs May.
“You are,” said the librarian.
Mrs May is understood to also have failed to get a taxi home after insisting it was in both her and the driver’s interest that she get a free deal.